self love

 “The universe is not outside of you. Look inside yourself, everything that you want you already are.”-Rumi. How many times in a day do you look in the mirror and say that you are enough, how many times do you thank yourself for everything you do to make it through the day, how many times do you pat yourself on the back and appreciate yourself for making it through the scorching sun, the whipping winds, the deep waters, the dark nights and the pouring rains?  I remember crying in the darkest hours of night for not making it. I remember telling myself that I’m not doing enough. And to put a cherry on top of the hundred layer cake you have baked, people would pick on your biggest deepest insecurities and tell you to ‘fix’ yourself. It tears you apart not being able to live up to standards of your society. It wrecks your self-esteem when the best you do still has no social value. No one but you know what you are going through and so no one else can really tell how much it hurts when your efforts are dismissed as nothing.

We listen to so many voices. Voices that are directors of our lives. Voices that are ready to criticize but never to appreciate. We let them enter our souls, make their homes and settle in. we have no security checkpoints to keep the dangerous, harmful, not needed opinions and voices out. They tear our soul apart to feed on it, yet we still welcome more of these thoughts inside. We drown underwater, our vision blurred, breathing impossible, every move we make is slow, our bodies need extra force to move forward yet the retarding forces wear us out and we give in. all these thoughts that infiltrate our souls are resting peacefully inside us. “There is a voice that doesn’t use words, listen”-Rumi. This voice comes from within, from the bottom of our hearts yet our hearts are sealed. To listen to this voice is to free yourself from all the other unnecessary ones. Loving you for who you are may be difficult but it’s important. One thing I’ve learned over the years is that YOU come first. Because if you don’t prioritize yourself no one else will.

Respect your opinions, appreciate your beauty, embrace your flaws and be proud of your scars and wounds. “The wound is the place where the light enters you”. Let the light enter, illuminate your soul to see the world with a new sparkle in your eye. When your heart is filled with love for your being you start seeing the world with compassion in your eyes, the flowers look brighter, the weather seems pleasant, you feel at ease with yourself and it allows you to feel at ease with the world. The way you treat yourself is an example set for others on how to treat you. It sets the boundaries and limits nobody is allowed to cross whatever the cost may be. The day we are satisfied with who we are, flaws of the world will seem less, people will seem kinder and their opinions less harsh.

If we make self-love a necessity in our personalities so many of our traits that harm us will nullify. Such as jealousy, when you know that you are at your best you will never compare yourself to others or envy their success and beauty. If you compare, it’ll be between you in the present - with your past self, which will automatically make you appreciate yourself, the efforts you did along the way and who you are now. You will be motivated to move forward with a positive attitude.

It’s a beautiful feeling to be alone and not lonely, in fact at peace with yourself. When you can spend hours with yourself and enjoy every second, savor every moment when a laugh escapes from your heart, a smile appears on your lips or a tear drops on your cheeks. You may be hurting right now, the world might be at a standstill or moving too fast for you to catch up, you might be feeling trapped inside your own body but “Know that one day, your pain will become your cure.” And when it does you’ll be grateful for every tear that dropped from your eyes, every meltdown you had, every time you pushed yourself to take one more step, just one more, you’ll be grateful for it all, for your efforts for your hard work and for life in itself. Remember one needs to have breakdowns, to have a break through. One day you will make it, you’ll look back and smile, pat yourself on the back and thank yourself for everything you did to make it till here.